Teach Me to Trust

I’ve spent the past hour,  well really weeks or so, processing leading a mission trip this fall. Yes,  if you didn’t already know, I will be spending 3 months in a country TBD.

Yet, in the midst of this I’ve been feeling the weight of insignificance. It’s hard to trust God that I will raise enough money or that the trip will even happened in the first place.

In the last year I’ve had some health struggles, but by cutting out gluten I’ve been pretty okay 95% of the time.

After my trip to Cambodia getting cancelled back in December and many things within that trip being handled in a non-professional manner, to say I’m a little discouraged about mission trips coming to fruition is an understatement.

Besides that, donations have always been a struggle for me. The only exception would be my Cambodia trip that never happened. Never have I felt more supported and loved in regards to missions.

There’s a lot of fear on the health side and the finances side. I can’t trust my body or money to be there when I need it.

And ultimately, it makes sense that is where God wants me to be, relying on him alone.

Still, I had to have a long conversation. with God, because part of me is so very scared of these things.

And I know that there is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear (1 John 4:18).

And I will stand on that truth, but it doesn’t mean I’m there yet.

So as I conversed with the God of the universe my last request was this,

And I want people to invest not in me, but in the Kingdom of God.

Mark 7:8 says, You have let go of the commands of God and you are holding on to the traditions of men.

I love the gentle voice of conviction of the Spirit.

If you walk in fear and insecurity, you are holding on to the traditions of men.  If you only give because you “know the person,” you are giving into the traditions of men. If the aim of your life is to abide by the rules of your culture and not radically chase after God, you too are giving into the traditions of men.

So friends let us follow the commands of God.

He says, go and make disciples.

Down the street. To the nations. All means none excluded.

Only donate because you see Christ in me. But regardless of that, partner with what the Lord is doing in the world. And my friends there is much more happening than my PASSPORT mission trip. There are many great orgs that can use a helping hand or serious investment. Spend your time in prayer for salvation to come anywhere and everywhere.


-A World Changer (named Haley Lowe)



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